Condoms in the Candy Bowl

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A Slight Pause

If anyone still reads this blog besides the three people that I know of.....my apologies for no new posts this week. I don't know about the other authors but I was a little blocked. Sometimes, and it's usually after I read other entries from more serious writers, I get to feeling that what I'm writing, and what I'm writing about, is so stupid compared to real life issues that I just stop. But I guess it's time to get over it and go on with less severe chatter about what is going on at the "Lounge" this past week.



Actually, nothing spectacular for me on the day shift. Sure, there have been some new faces for me along with my favorite old faces, but the interesting thing about the new ones is the fact that most of these people stopped coming in right after they met the former owner. That's right!! Mr. Personality was not very hospitable to them and some said that when they ordered a drink and their requested liquor was not available, he would tell them to drink something else! If they did return they found that he didn't even restock what they asked for.



Some would take this personally and not come back. I can imagine him standing at the end of the bar, telling people to drink something they didn't want and then glaring at them and/or just being his loud, opinionated, know it all self and making them so uncomfortable in his presence that they would leave the bar and not want to come back. I remember the tense atmosphere he could create. He knew it too. I think he enjoyed the power.



Thankfully the tension is completely gone and a good natured person who wants everyone to be happy is in its place. How refreshing it is to see a business owner really want to please his customers!! It's also a better working environment for the bartenders. No more eggshells, yea!



Anyway, getting back to the "new faces" (actually old patrons who couldn't deal with the old ogre) I am happy to say that after speaking with them that most of them were unaware of the change and will be patronizing "Mr. E's" establishment with pleasure. I was also assured that they will invite their friends to join them. I was also very proud that the "regulars" (you guys rock!) were very welcoming and friendly to them so they will be comfortable returning to the "Lounge" with their buddies.



Just for some suspense I will stop right here. More to come..............maybe tomorrow I'll tell you about the impromptu party that "Mr. E" agreed to host. I helped with the arrangements but didn't attend. I wish I did, I heard it was crazy....it must have been because one of the neighbors came in the next day and..............



Tune in this weekend for more!



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Preparations and Observations

Its been over six weeks and he still has the neck brace and a feeding tube. Along with Alzheimer’s, a diagnosis of Parkinson’s Disease. When we talk he is as lucid as anyone, but sometimes he floats into a time warp and speaks to me as if its 1945, 1955, 1963, or 1968. He is quite cognizant, he knows where he is and what he is saying. But nurses, doctors and even some of his family just don’t understand….he is where his is, in his twilight, on the road.

I’ve served where he fought. I am so proud of that. I was assigned to Okinawa as a Patrol Supervisor of Military Police after serving with the Fleet Marine Force in Korea back in ‘83 and ‘84. I have walked the North End of Okinawa from Red Beach, Kin Kin Cho, from Camp Schwab to Tiger Beach, from Tiger Beach to Ona Ona Son, from White Beach to Naha. Unc (short for Uncle) fought in WWII, he was Duck Driver in the 10th Army. He fought under General Simon Bolivar Buckner, Jr., Marine General Roy Geiger and General Vinegar Joe Stillwell.

“Go, go tell ‘em that its all right….” Unc kept reaching for an item that wasn’t there I didn’t know what it was at first. This Veteran of WWII is laying in a nursing home, but he is talking to me from his house on West End Avenue in Inwood, to him, its 1968. “Boy, tell ‘em to do right, take care of each other, finish doing the work.” Work, what work Unc? “Ba’ (pronounced ‘Bay’, his nickname for my Dad) needs the tools to finish fixin’ the truck and I gotta get more wood from that Ol’ Cracker to finish the potato houses…”.

“The trucks boy, we need to get ammo to the beach, Ba’s gonna’ move’em out, you brothers got work to do!” (Some of my relatives would have placated him about now and called the nurse…not me, I had to understand). ‘Make it plain Unc, I need to get it right.’ His emaciated frame got rigid as he looked me in the eyes, “bad times are coming boy, just like Rob said…its time you got the trucks running and start loading up.”

I held tightly to his bed rail as he continued, this wasn’t incoherent babbling, he knew exactly what he was saying, I needed to know why? ‘Why now Unc, why the ammo and the move now?’ “Boy, can’t you see? Its just like Pop said, when you can’t get gas for the cars you gotta grow your own food…you can’t eat cotton, so you better grow potatoes…rationing kept us from getting to market, so we gotta grow our own!”

‘But why move, why the trucks Unc?’ “Boy, you gotta get the ammo to the beach because that’s where there coming from! Get the bullets to the guns and get the wounded and the dead off the beach…you gotta move’em”. I realized that in the haze of his dementia was the sound of common sense. God showed him the future in the flashes of his yesterdays, I was being warned. Now what to do? ‘Unc I understand, I’ll do all I can, I’ll do what daddy taught me.’

Now an old man who works at the nursing home, same age as Unc, was listening in, his name is Howie. Unc now is bridging several time lines, now its 1970 as well as 1968. “Don’t do what Calvin did. You don’t have to be no Officer to be important or looked up to. I know you got the grades, your sister told me. You don’t have to be big to be bad, empty wagons make a lot of noise, Marines only make noise when they shoot somethin’."


Calvin was my hero, he was everything I wanted to be, a Marine Corps Officer, he didn’t know how to be afraid. I always felt fear and thought something was wrong with me. When I became a Sergeant in the Marine Corps I realized that fear was healthy, acting in fear was ignorant and foolish, challenging fear was the place of a leader. I fought to be up front, just like Calvin. He was killed in Vietnam. I overcame the obstacles and made a place in the ranks of the Marine Corps.

Unc said, “I remember when you were a little boy, I asked you what you wanted to be when you grew up you said ‘a Senator’ and I asked you why and you said, ‘I want to be serious and important.’ Boy make sure you get plenty of seed to plant because important people get hungry too. Bad times are coming and you better know how to do the first things first, you here!” Yes Sir, I here.

The nurse came and said that she had to take Unc back to his room, we were in a little corner of the Dining Room when she came for him, Howie asked me to stay for a minute. Howie asked, “he was in the WAR?” I said, ‘Yes Sir, he fought under Buckner with 10th Army in Okinawa, he drove a DUCK.” Howie said, “I was in the infantry in Okinawa, you know they called that battle the ‘Typhoon of Steel’ lots of good boys didn’t come back. We loved to see the Ducks.”

Howie slightly wobbled as he sat down in his chair he was in his late 80’s, just like Unc. Howie went on about the battle. “We were just kids, but at the end of that battle every one of us were men….we saw good friends die and had no problem killing Japs, that’s what we had to do.” Howie wiped his eyes when he told me about Ernie Pyle, a war correspondent who died on Ie Shima, (also IeJima a small island just a mile northwest of Okinawa).

“Why isn’t he at the VA?” Howie asked. “This facility is OK, but what’s out at Northport is the best and that’s what your Uncle deserves” I quickly retorted, “you all do…how much is to little to give for you men who saved the world.” “Thanks kid, but you being one of us knows that we won’t get nothing unless someone fights for it…you and me still have to fight.” ‘Yes Sir, we do.' Lets see if the nurses have your Uncle tucked in good…”

“Boy, where is that bag of bagels, I just put it down….”. Unc drove a bagel delivery truck for a man who owned bagel stores in Far Rockaway, Cedarhurst and Inwood back in the 60’s and 70’s. He got steady work from a group of lawyers in Cedarhurst and Far Rockaway back in the 70’s also, one of them became a Judge and hired Unc full time. He always had bagels to bring to work at the law office (he was the janitor) or take home. He wanted to give me some bagels to take with me when I left. The bag was in 1968…. his intent is for always.

‘Don’t worry about it Unc, I understand, I’ll get by later in the week, I got your Legion Cover (American Legion Hat). I want you to have it for Memorial Day.’ “When you see my brothers, tell them I’m here, I know they get busy, let ‘em know I’m alright…you here boy. You Here?” ‘Yes Sir, I here, I’ll pass it on. (All his brothers have passed away…including my Daddy)’.

“Boy, make sure you pray, get right with God, get those you know right with Jesus. The time is on us and we need to be right! Do you here?” ‘Yes Sir, I here.’ Howie handed me a leaflet, I stuck it in my pocket and thanked him. When I left the nursing home I drove straight to my house. I sat down and opened both bottles of wine and started playing old time gospel music. I played a song that my Daddy liked by Sam Cooke called ‘The Last Mile of the Way.’

When I got home I thought about Memorial Day Weekend, then I read the leaflet Howie gave me. This is what it said:

“It is the VETERAN, not the preacher, who has given us freedom of religion.

It is the VETERAN, not the reporter, who has given us freedom of the press.

It is the VETERAN , not the poet, who has given us freedom of speech.

It is the VETERAN, not the campus organizer, who has given us freedom to assemble.

It is the VETERAN, not the lawyer, who has given us the right to a fair trial.

It is the VETERAN, not the politician, Who has given us the right to vote.

It is the VETERAN who salutes the Flag,

It is the Veteran who serves under the Flag,

ETERNAL REST GRANT THEM O LORD, AND LET PERPETUAL LIGHT SHINE UPON THEM.

Between barbecue, parties, shopping and drinking remember what Memorial Day is for. If you know a fallen Veteran, find a way to honor him or her for the rest of this month.



When I left the nursing home, I couldn't help notice the stars and stripes flapping in the wind.

Real Heroes will be draped in it.

RJ

Reality

After reading RJ's last post it seems so insignificant and just plain shallow to write about a bar and the silliness that goes on in everyday life. It was very well written, I must say, and if he wrote a book I would definitely read it. Fact or fiction (too real to be fiction) it was deep and meaningful, which is something too real for this forum.

The truth is I hate dealing with the reality of tragedy, feelings and especially death. This is where my people skills end. I never know what to say to someone who has gone through life changing events in their lives. "I'm sorry", is nowhere near enough, doesn't help the person and, I think, just makes them feel worse. Maybe a hug would be better, a silent hug. Maybe they would know how badly you feel for them and what they are going through and what they have to live with. Maybe you wouldn't feel as horrible about how they feel hearing your apology. Who knows?

As soon as I can, I will chatter on about the stupidity of everyday life at the bar.........just not tonight.

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Darkness Revisited

It was the morning side of the night shift and I couldn’t wait to get myself out of that smelly, stinking reception area at Men’s Central Jail. It was a night full of events, gang tensions, racial tensions and sexual tensions caused by marching the state prisoners past the softs and queens in the holding cells bound for another one of many jails in Los Angeles County. I worked a double and I wanted to get home, I had grass to cut and a ‘honey do’ list as long as my arm.

The last Wednesday in September was now the first day of October, I was going home at 8:00 and would be there at 8:30, so I thought. My relief had walked in and I was going over the movement schedule and the body count before I walked out. Then the jail started to shake and roll. It was the Whittier Narrows Earthquake. Training kicked in, we all instinctively started locking down the jail about 7 seconds before the lockdown announcement was given. I was totally pissed off.

I got off shift about 30 minuets later when it was determined that I wasn’t going to get anymore overtime. I called June from the locker room and got no answer. I broke all speed laws getting to my home. I saw June’s car was still in the driveway, I immediately checked the front and back of the house. The lattice work and masonry had come down on the porch in front of the door. I didn’t know what I was going into, the door was tough to get open but I did. I went in.

I called June, no answer. I drew my weapon and went into tunnel vision. I cleared all rooms in the house except our bedroom. I walked in quietly and looked around and saw June curled up on the floor in the closet doorway shaking. Then the first aftershock hit. I picked her up and carried her to the living room after putting away my weapon. She was totally shaken emotionally as well as physically. This was her first earthquake.

All the pictures that were on the walls were now on the floor, the house had cracks in the walls and there was broken glass from the china closet all on the dining room table. She looked at it all and broke down in tears. I sat her down, got her shoes and told her to sit still while I checked the rest of the damage out. The water heater and the gas lines had not been damaged. When phone service was restored, I called her boss (family members) and told them she wasn’t coming to work.

I got her quiet and kissed her and said if she didn’t feel safe in the house I would set up a tent in the yard and see if we had water. We did. I turned on the T.V., called the local Sheriffs station and got the status of the utilities from the Water Co., which was just down the block. Living in the hills of the San Gabriel Valley had some advantages, also a small town feeling. I cleaned up the debris, accessed the damage and checked in with the rest of my family on both coasts.

It was a little after noon when we sat down together and she talked to me about life. “I can’t imagine what I would do without you…you jump right up and know what to do. I don’t want you to leave me.” But I would have to, I had to go to work in less than 4 hours with no sleep, there are no excuses to not doing what I was sworn to do. I set up the tent in the yard and said if she didn’t want to stay home alone she could go to her sisters house. She said she would wait.

I got to work and let my supervisor know what went on at home and requested a post I could be at that I could be with another deputy if I started to slack off due to lack of sleep. ‘Big J’ said, “We got all kinds of people tonight for overtime and you got 60 hours logged already this week…go home, see you Sunday.” I called June and told her I was on my way, there were two more aftershocks to the quake.

She ran into my arms when I got home. I told her we both needed to rest. She wouldn’t sleep in the house or in the tent. I setup a bed in our two car garage and I lit up the yard, I had a boom box and a small TV setup for us. When we went to bed I was exhausted, she wasn’t. We talked about our mortality. She was afraid for what would happen to me If I got hurt. I told her I would never get hurt. The God that saw me through the Marines would keep me as a law man.

“But what happens to me if, if, you ….die. I don’t know what I would do without you.” I told her “I expect you to carry on and be happy…there are people in your yesterdays and some you’ve just met who would love it if I died so they could be with you.” She slapped me, but it was the truth. “June, I will keep you safe, I can’t imagine anything except us!” As she eased out of her night gown and lay next to me, she asked “would you carry on without me.”

I answered sincerely but without thinking saying “I would have no life without you…it would be an empty mess.” She wrapped herself around me and we were one all night. I remember the smell of the lemon tree in the yard and the scent of the roses and the cilantro she planted in the yard and the radio playing ‘Loving You’ by Minnie Ripperton.

Again, I stare into a bottle of whiskey looking at my blurry reflection through the distilled amber spirit. June’s birthday was Sunday. I started drinking when I left Mom’s on Sunday Afternoon when I got into this empty structure I wishfully call a home. I drank my whiskey until I couldn’t cry anymore, I had no tears left by Monday afternoon. I was supposed to go out on Sunday for brunch, many things in life are not meant to be.

June also died this Month 9 years ago. I understand why Grant crawled into a whiskey bottle when he felt he had nothing to live for. I never thought a day would come when my body and my soul would be so terribly damaged at the same time. It’s pathetic, that what was said so thoughtlessly all those years ago would be a man’s reality…an empty mess. I understand why some men can be brave without care, its easy when death becomes an acquaintance.

When you have love in your life you can be invincible, without it you can be disposable. But as long as we ‘live’ we can make our choices. In the darkness, with my bottle, my bible, my gun and my sorrow, the radio was playing CSN, the lyrics went “One morning I woke up and I knew you were gone…..Carry on,
Love is coming,
Love is coming to us all.”

RJ

Seating Arrangements

It's funny how a small thing such as getting new chairs for the bar can have a positive effect on people.

On Wednesday, Mr. E's new chairs arrived. About 45 minutes later he had them all assembled and set out at the bar. Out with the old, in with the new. It was nice to see the difference some chairs could make for a business owner and his customers. Just think, someone thought of his patrons comfort. Such a novel idea for a small business owner and such appreciation from his customers! "Old Bossman" could have had it much easier if he would have cared about his patrons. Chairs!! It's so easy!

Anyway, before I over analyze anything, the chairs look great, next is paint and then maybe the floor will be done.....oh, and our greatest wish? The bathrooms. I guess we will have to give Mr. E some time to do these things. But, I have total faith that he will get them done.

The day shift has been mediocre, but that's okay for now. There were a few old/new faces today. Old for "The Beverly Lounge", but new for "1762 Broadway Lounge" (or as I just call it, "Broadway Lounge"). Nice, fun guys just letting off some steam after a day at the track. A little drunk but entertaining enough before becoming obnoxious. And I can't forget the few regulars. Today it was "Old Man Charlie", then the new guys, then "Storm", then "Rebel". After them came "Limpin Pimpin" then "Cho" along with a few during the day who's name's I don't know and whom I've never seen before.

So, all in all, the day wasn't awful. I guess that is what matters, right? That it isn't awful and we are starting to make a little money and get back to our normal routines. I'll wait for things to pick up because I know they will. The night business is doing well and now we have to work on "Happy Hour", so that the day business won't suck and we can hang in our territory for a while longer. I, along with the Monday thing, don't like change. It's part of my nature and I'm sure a part of a lot of peoples nature.

Drink up Johnny!! See you at Broadway.

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I Don't Like Mondays.........much

I remembered a song from past years about Mondays. The subject matter was rather disturbing if anyone else recalls. It was about the first, or one of the first school shootings where it seemed a young man brought a gun to school and shot up his class. The reason, also disturbing, was that this kid didn't like Mondays (probably not the true reason for him doing this).

I also don't care for Mondays either.....but they do turn into Tuesdays eventually, right?

This was a fleeting thought (that Mondays eventually end and become Tuesdays not the song subject) while cleaning the bar this morning. It's a dirty job but it keeps me busy and gives me a purpose in life at the moment. Sometimes, cleaning can be metaphorical....almost. Draw your own conclusions about that one, it would be too much thinking to write at the moment, for me anyway.

Just as I finished washing the wainscoting and scrubbing the dirt line around the edges of the floor (just a little something left over from the previous owner, figures, right? He took everything but the dirt, lol), Monday started to look better. Uncle Tim arrived with his smiling face and reassuring attitude. After he drank a couple of beers and we had our usual pleasant chat, I felt a whole lot better. Let's face it, it's been a little slow and I always feel responsible for that. I know it's irrational but I take pride in any job I do so if I'm not selling enough booze for the bar I get weird (or weirder), maybe paranoid and I sort of take it personally.

Uncle Tim is the best person in the world to talk to about anything. So are a lot of the people who come to the bar when I'm working. After a while, more patrons came in. I forgot the pseudonyms so I will just say there was "Storm", "The Fisherman", "Cho", "The Suit" and also "Chucky" with his sidekick Hershey. It was so good to see the regulars coming back home.

The Sunday bartender arrived, a very pretty Latina who we will name, "Effie" . I guess she also works Monday nights although I'm not sure of her schedule. I will find out and post it for everyone ASAP. I liked her (she fits right in and she's really nice) so you probably will too. I've only heard nice things about her from everyone and she's friendly and welcoming to the patrons. We need one more like her to replace a certain pain in the butt and we'll be perfectly staffed!!

So, I guess I'm starting to like Mondays a little more than I used to. Thanks to those who come in on Mondays, of course. It really felt like it's going to be okay from here on.

Thanks for everything (like reading this blog and patronizing the bar after all the drama). I hope to see you all soon.

Ashley works Tuesdays. I'll be there from Wednesday through Friday of course. Stop by, we'd love to see you!!

Later,

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