A Change of Seasons

Fall, By The River

“What the fuck do you mean they can’t find him? ….He went where? Why? So let me get this straight, because of a so called alleged stain on his personal reputation, Bear goes off into the woods to meet up with the Militia to settle the matter, how? He had what? Who was he last seen with? Skippy…this can’t be good.”

Then I got an e-mail from NF. It was a message from Bear. I still had Star on the phone and read her the message. She was livid. There was only one way to unfuck this. “I know where he is going Star, I’m on the first thing smoking. I’ll be in Tennessee before the weekend.” Bear was going up to the old Church by the River. I had to get there to do two things. Attest to a mans honor and define to a fool what a ’cult ’ is.

Hill Folks don't like strangers, including Northerners, any ethnics, and most anyone not from the hills. Some so called 'hill folk' aint loved much either.

I did have a big problem being in the South during the week of a Presidential Election. If the South didn’t have enough tension the thought of a Black President was not reassuring in Bear’s part of the world. The fact that I had to travel in and around the Smokey Mountains did not make me feel real good at first.

I got into the backwoods town early enough to get some liquor, food and pick up some smokes for Star. I got to Bear’s when a pickup truck with a rebel flag pulled up behind me. It was Skippy. “Where the fuck is Bear, Deputy” “Up Yonder by the Old Church, get in we gotta ride” said Skippy as he opened the passenger door. I grabbed my Bible, jumped in and thought ‘what the fuck did I get into.’

At the old barn behind the Church near the River a lantern dimly lit the way. Skippy had his hand on his holster and said “go on in”. Bear and the Welder were working on something as the lathe stopped turning. “Hey Rev, glad to see you” said the Welder to me as he put down his torch. I shook hands with Bear, who looked at me and said “I should kill Benny for opening his nasty cock sucking mouth.”

“Later for that Bear, where is the congregation Welder?" “Down at the water line Rev…waiting for you.” So we left the barn, the Welder, Skippy, Bear and me. We met the ‘hill folk’ down at the waterline (right at the rivers edge). The brethren had surrounded Benny and started discussing how his night was going to go if the truth wasn’t told. In the dark cool night beneath the pines, I shouted “lets get on with this…what is the accusation?”


Ol’ Deak,(thin old man with a long grey beard) spoke up, “dat Benny boy accused Bear of being a ‘Heathen’ and a liar. Heathen, meaning not a worshiper of Jesus and a liar, in dat Bear didn’t keep his word regarding Benny's dwellin place.” I looked and asked, “is that right Benny?” “Yeah” said Benny in an effeminate whisper. What’s a Heathen Benny? “Somebody who doesn’t worship God.”

“Let me make this real plain Benny, if what you say is true these old boys and girls will never talk to Bear again and treat him like a stranger after all this time being a damn good neighbor. But if your not telling it right, you might not ever leave these woods…you understand the gravity of your situation. Do you?” “Oh God, help me” shouted Benny.


“Did Bear tell you that you could stay in his home for about two months, did he?” asked the Welder. “Yes, but I needed more time” whined Benny. “Bear gave you a month more, I was there when he did” said Bubba Ray as Skippy spit out some tobacco juice from the chaw of Red Man stuck in his jaw. “I had nowhere to go” said Benny.

“So you spread rumors about Bear to your congregation and Bear gets treated like shit because you fit your cock-sucking lips to spread a lie” said Skippy. The crowd of about 30 local souls murmured loudly, I spoke up before this went on to its apparent conclusion. “Lets all cool off and pipe down…Benny who told you that Bear was a Heathen?” “Rev, my Pastor did.” “Benny who told you that Bear doesn’t worship God?” Again Benny answered, “my Pastor.”

“Bear fed you when hungry, clothed you when you had nothing but work clothes and put a roof over your head…is that a Christian thing to do according to the Bible Benny? “Yes!” “Ok, Benny…you accuse Bear of not worshipping God because of your Pastor, did you ever see Bear pray in his house?” “Yes, at dinner most times but…”

“Shut up Benny, stop being a cult member and start thinking for yourself, if a man prays to God he is performing an act of worship. This crowd of hill folk are perplexed, they wonder if they should let a liar stay among them, or if they should let him float down the river….I’m not talking about Bear, I’m talking about you.” "What should happen to you Benny?” “I definitely shouldn’t die” said Benny. “Who said anything about being dead” I asked.

“Listen Benny, just as Cain was banished from Eden you must accept being banished from these hills. Also, tell all the folk the truth and admit your own sin and your own wrong doing. In this is forgiveness but not forgetness…but it will get your sorry ass out of these woods, right Skippy.” Skippy spit on the ground and said “Yep, it will do that.”

Benny’s mouth ran like an open sewer as he relayed what his so called Pastor and his cult told him to believe. Even though everyone got upset, they did forgive Benny and Skippy drove him to his car. Skippy told him it would be a good idea not to come round these hills for several years. I stayed with the crowd of hill folk as we passed the communion ball jar and the cracklins. It wasn’t the Eucharist, but it was shine and cornbread.

“Hey Rev, how you been son” said the Colonel,(Colonel Jeb Lee Davis, Attorney at Law) a tall stately man with a short white beard. “Fine Sir, I don’t understand why my presence was needed since you were in town.” "Rev,.. RJ….listen heah, there is much we can do and some thangs we caint, I did not want to get in the middle of this since my boy most likely would be the one to adjudicate the matter if anything happened to that effeminate cocksucker they call a man.”


The Welder said that “it’s a good thang you came on South...this could have been real bad given lots of the local ministers wouldn’t come up the hill and you’re the only one Bear and Skippy trust. Rev yur good people…hope you git to stay awhile.” Fall in the Smokey Mountain foothills of Tennessee is totally breathtaking. Being down by the river on a starry night, sippin shine with some good ole boys had me feeling fine.


At the time of this post, November 5th, Barak Obama was elected President of the United States. This state, Tennessee went 70% for McCain. I mention this because things are changing in America, even in Tennessee as we speak. As I sat with Bear after putting down a good dinner, we watched TV (down here no sex shows). As a result of a ballot issue two lesbians ran a very demonstrative infomercial on local TV about how their 'sex toys' worked.

God Bless America