Winds of Change

(photo by Steve Stone)

That nip in the air. Football on Sundays. Baseball fever as the remaining games all have playoff implications. Yes, summer is done and the crisp days of autumn are once again upon us.

With the change of seasons there is almost an equally tangible change at 1762. There seems to be a return to the laid back, low stress atmosphere here that first made a regular of me.

I saw a change in Pregnant Lily last night. She has really embraced her impending motherhood and looks forward to her new role as Mommy. I think that becoming a parent for the first time, especially becoming a mother, gives a sense of completeness and purpose. Of course there are fears of the unknown and worries about our own capabilities and adequacies, but ultimately we are left with a feeling of "Oh yeah. Now everything makes sense". Well wishes to you Lily. Parenthood ain't easy but I think you will be up to the task.

On the whole, I have to say that the summer here had a high-strung feel to it. At times the tension here was unbearable.

Sadly, much of the edginess was the product of what I suspected for some time. I have seen countless lives wasted, personalities altered, and opportunities squandered as the weak willed seek that increasingly elusive mother-of-all highs. Coke. Heroin. Must be some really potent shit. It turns honest men into liars who are eventually ensnared in their own webs of deceit and dishonesty.
They start to trip up by telling too many people too many different tales until we are left to wonder if they themselves even know what the truth is. Timmy says it best. "Be true to thine ownself". When you look in the mirror and you don't trust the guy looking back at you, a wake up call is in order. When you must weave grandiose tales of your mock accomplishments to somehow validate yourself and your existence, a reality check is in order. When you must condemn the acts of others to remove attention and suspicion from yourself you have a problem. A big one.

So, while I usually hate to see the summer go, I am looking forward to the crispness and freshness of fall as we shift gears.

May you all find inner peace.